No Happy Medium

For weeks now I have been pondering why the band can be so finicky. Right now, it won't let me eat very much which makes for no weight loss, but a hungry Sandy.

My last teeny fill was in June and that month I could eat and lost 4 pounds. Then a teeny unfill the end of July, a month where I couldn't eat much but I lost 5 pounds. I think I have just over 4 cc in my 10 cc band. August was a stellar eating month, barely a stuck episode and again I lost another 4 pounds. At the beginning of June I weighed 184 pounds and at the beginning of September 171 pounds. I weigh the same 171 pounds this morning. My weight has fluctuated up and down a few pounds for the last two months.

Since before Chicago, my band has been really tight, then loose, then tight... Somedays, I can eat normal solid protein, healthy stuff. Other days, its a crap shoot: whatever crap I can get down goes into my mouth, usually chocolate, chips, ice cream, milkshakes. Because I am physically hungry. There doesn't seem to be a happy medium.

Just when I decide I should go for an unfill, I can eat. Last Wednesday, I was out with a friend for a Moroccan dinner and was able to eat a bit of eggplant salad with couscous (yucky), two chicken thighs and a sweet dessert similar to baklava. The dinner did span a 2 hour period since it was a demo and as the chef cooked each course, it was served. The next day, I gagged on two bites of a small ham sandwich. It was back to ice cream again.

Each time I get stuck, I go on puree or mushies for a day and it seems to help reduce the swelling. But I have yet to figure out what will trigger the band to squeeze shut. Last night, I had a dinner party and merrily cooked most of the day. I had crisp bacon and scrambled eggs for breakfast and some cheese and nuts for lunch. No problems. My DH had made Coquille St. Jacques (scallops in cream sauce with whipped mashed potatoes). I was able to eat almost all the appetizer serving. Dinner was a wipe-out. I think I had three bites of potato, beef and some broccoli. And that was it. For two hours I suffered. I had this ache above my band and I waited for "something" to move through. Finally, hours later when I went to bed, my lovely dinner came back up over the next hour, along with massive heartburn, more vomiting and then relief at last.  

So far this morning I've had a glass of milk and a coffee. My stomach is still a bit sore. So what to do. I have been so diligent about chewing, chewing, chewing until mush. I can recall a few of my stuck episodes have been swallowing too much too soon. But I still cannot understand why somedays are good and others are bad. I will be honest and say, this is not what I signed up for. I expected the band to help me slow down and eat less. Not stop me from eating solids one day, just to catch up with lots the next day.

Just ranting on. I need to send an update to my surgical clinic nurses. I'll ask them if I should have a small unfill and see if that helps. There are a couple of reasons why I have not lost any weight in the last two months and it has nothing to do with the band.

• The first reason would be all the travelling I have done and eating out. Lots of eating out and drinking. First in Chicago, then California, then Vermont. In a way I feel quite good that I didn't gain any weight.
• Another reason is that I am about 15 pounds from goal and I knew weight loss would slow. In fact I am very happy with being 171 pounds and think anything more is just icing on the cake. I've bought a bunch of new clothes and am feeling rather small. I have this tummy problem (ok, I have a big muffin top to get rid of still). This is a weight I was at for many, many years. Remember the set-point theory. It will take a lot to break through.
• My last reason for the scale stall. I have not been exercising regularly. As the fall doldrums set in, a bit of depression hits and it is hard to get my bum off the couch. I have a gym membership and need to get into a routine of just doing it!

That concludes my little rant for today. Liquids/purees for me today.

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